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You're The One That Can't See It

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I don't wanna be afraid
I wanna wake up feeling beautiful today

You know, I think I wanna have a more positive view when it comes to the way that I look. I already accepted the fact that I'm not the prettiest rose in the bunch but that doesn't mean I should let the negativity consume me. There is the famous saying that everyone is beautiful in their own way. So just because people don't directly say that I'm beautiful to my face, doesn't mean I'm an all round ugly being, kan?

From my form 1 days till now, I always have the tendency to be great friends with good looking girls. So I understand that the attention somehow tips more to her especially when it comes to the opposite sex. I guess that factor sort of plummeted my self esteem level to a lower place. I'm not jealous of her looks, I just hate the fact that because she's beautiful, I'm automatically invisible.

You know another thing, I can recall numerous times where a girl complimented me. Saying my hair looks pretty or my outfit look goods. I never respond to those compliments very well cause I don't how to and there is a small part of me that thinks I don't deserve the compliment in the first place. I appreciate those words of flattery but how come in a rare occasion when a guy gives me a compliment, the effect is deeper? Pelik benar....

I guess I like complimenting guys and I expect some small favor in return? Tah la... But the problem is that guys treat me like a guy and they believe that I don't need compliments. I mean a small one isn't so hard.

So there you go. I don't know what the fuck I'm ranting but I felt like I needed to let it out somehow. I guess I need a reason to believe that I'm beautiful in some way. Tah la. Whatever.

Maybe I am pretty. Hang je yang tak nampak :P

Indulging in the beats of : Rise from the ashes by Quietdrive

Chou

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